Anger Management: Strategies for Parents and Grandparents
Parenting and grandparenting can be an emotional roller coaster. You’re filled with love for your kids and grandkids. Yet caring for them can also be scary, frustrating, and sometimes maddening. But no matter how riled up you get, it’s important to control your anger around children.
The importance of managing anger
It never feels good to rage at someone you love, especially a child. Anger is a completely natural and healthy emotion. But research shows that frequent, uncontrolled anger is linked to heart disease, digestive disorders, insomnia, and other health problems. It’s also linked to family violence and aggression.
Anger management can help you deal with your child or grandchild in a kind and constructive way. It also sets a good example of how to handle challenging situations and work out conflicts.
Anger management strategies
When you feel like you’re on the verge of losing your temper with a challenging child, rely on anger management strategies to keep your anger from boiling over.
First, try to calm yourself with relaxation methods such as:
Slow, deep breathing
Picturing a relaxing scene (visual imagery)
Repeating a relaxing word or phrase in your mind
Next, try action steps that can help you to manage the heated situation:
Talk calmly and listen. Make sure that you speak clearly. Check to see if the child understands you. Remember to listen carefully to what he or she is trying to say to you.
Be logical. Children, particularly young children, probably aren’t trying to make you angry. You may be able to let your defenses down if you stop to realize that the child is not out to get you.
Don’t make generalizations. Avoid saying things like “you never clean your room” or “you always leave a mess.” Be sure to praise the things that your child does well or correctly.
Be aware of an impending storm. Your heart may start pounding. You may tense up and clench your teeth just before you’re about to lash out in anger. If so, use the time-tested strategy of counting to 10 before talking. Figure out what’s getting you riled up and try to respond thoughtfully. If you’re still about to explode, leave the room until you calm down.
Try to use the word “I” instead of “you.” This will help make things less confrontational. For instance, say “I feel frustrated when you do X because …” instead of “You are making me crazy.”
Don’t let yourself get defensive. Your child may criticize you. Don’t start a fight or criticize in return. Try to understand what’s really bothering him or her. Ask questions calmly to try to resolve the issue.
Use some humor. Laugh, get silly with your child, or do some mock wrestling. But don’t engage in hostile teasing or make jokes at your child’s expense.
Give yourself a break. Don’t confront your child or deal with a problem when you’re already stressed or exhausted from a long day at work. Take 10 to 15 minutes to relax, calm down, and do something you enjoy before you tackle a difficult problem.
Taking the long view
Anger management strategies aren’t just for use in the heat of the moment. Doing meditation or yoga on a regular basis may put you in a calmer, more accepting frame of mind in general. Getting in more exercise routinely can help you relieve some of your everyday stresses. This can help you be more relaxed when you’re with your children.
Discipline is a way to teach your child. Think about your own behavior. Abuse is not just physical. Words can inflict deep wounds and lasting damage. Use your behavior to show children that conflict can be resolved without hitting, yelling, or name-calling.
Think about getting professional help for anger management if you can’t control your anger. Or if you have relationship problems with your children or grandchildren. Healthcare professionals can help you learn the skills you need to better communicate with children and change any negative thought patterns.
1351Baby shower guest sign in ideas
2533Boy baby shower decorations ideas
1607Girl baby shower favors ideas
23705Intermittent Fasting – Is It Safe For Children?
1791TOP 10 Girl baby shower themes ideas for 2017
23689It is Safe to Eat Raw Meat – A Guide to Choosing the Right Type
600Baby shower fruit tray ideas
4319Baby shower afternoon tea ideas
23735IBS, Depression, and Skin Problems in Fructose Malabsorption
1909Purchase The Special Twin Baby Shower Cakes From Your Local Stores
23715Understanding Poop – Constipation, IBS, and Other Digestive Disorders
3923Baby shower snack ideas pinterest
218710 Useful Triplet baby shower ideas for you!
4291High tea baby shower ideas – 10 ways to have a High tea baby shower party!
554Welcoming a Baby Angel in Style with the Best Baby shower souvenir ideas
2041Planning a Baby shower program ideas – detailed guide
2553TOP 10 Baby girl baby shower food ideas
2463Baby shower ideas pinterest boy
2531Fun baby shower gift ideas
994Baby girl shower gift ideas
3543Baby shower box ideas
1933Baby shower decorations ideas for boy
128Baby shower table ideas
4163Baby shower gift ideas for mom and dad
2051Neutral baby shower theme ideas
23797About Baby Wear
1533Funny baby shower ideas
2603Glamorous baby shower ideas
3719Baby shower ideas for cakes
1769Baby shower ideas for baby girl
410Ideas de baby shower
2827Baby showers idea
23703A Dirty Kid is a Happy Kid! Why Everyone Should Play in the Dirt
2449Baby shower gifts ideas for guests
21047Week 4 – I Found Out That I’m Pregnant!
526Baby shower gift ideas for guest